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It's all about the things I want in life,

the battle I face to get there,

the strength I need to make it through another day.

Saturday, October 15, 2011

Lessons: 3, and 4

This post is going to be a little different, as I am having a hard time relating to Lessons 3 & 4.

Lesson 3: You Become What You Believe

This lesson was for me all about becoming your authentic self.  Looking back a few years I really had no clue who I was, and was my purpose was.  As I grew and evolved and identified with my life, I came to really understand who I am as a person.  Now don't get me wrong, there is  still alot out there for me to learn, but I am getting there.  There was a point in my life a few years back, that everyday I would wake up and look in the mirror and think, I am fat or  I am ugly.  Every negative thought I filled my head with led me to believe more and more that, that was I was.  I read an article a few years ago that talked about self doubt, and overcoming what you believe yourself to be.  It really turned me around, and I learned to embrace myself for who I am.  Now, truth be told, I am overweight, its a battle I have been fighting my whole life.  But I am working on it, and it certainly does not define me.  I don't necessarily like being overweight, and the pro's to losing weight definitely defeat the cons, but like everything else it takes time.  I am on the right path again, with a totally different mindset then I have ever had in my life, so success if in the future.

So basically this lesson was a little tricky for me, because I already feel like I am who I believe myself to be.  I just need to continue to follow the actions to be my true authentic self.  I have been keeping a journal with more detailed things on these lessons for myself, and although I didn't find myself very interested in this lesson, I filled 4 pages in my journal on that night.  

Lesson 4: The Truth Will Set You Free

The title of the lesson is pretty much self explanatory.  I sat with this last night, meditated on it this morning, and thought more about it this evening.  I was trying to find some un-truth I have been hiding.  What am I not admitting to myself or others that is holding me back?  What kept coming to me was denial.  I often find myself denying things to myself, as if to say, if I don't accept it, its not happening.  I don't really have any big secret that I am keeping that will make me free to be who I am.  So the only thing I really got out of this was to be more aware of denying my truths as a way of ignoring what is really going on.

So all and all, I may not have found these lessons to be huge aHa moments, they did provoke thinking and a few realizations.  I guess that makes lesson learned.

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