what is this blog about you ask? nothing, everything, something... it's about my life, a way to vent it all out, a place to babble about things...some days i am creative, others not so much... enjoy


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It's all about the things I want in life,

the battle I face to get there,

the strength I need to make it through another day.

Sunday, September 09, 2007

i have peripheral neuropathy, porphyria, wernicke syndrome, cercical (neck) spondylosis and all that jazz

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so here i am dealing with numbness in my arms and hands when i sleep... to the extent that i wake up and they are 30lbs each... my poor digits look all bloated and painful... i get out of the bed, start moving and boom its gone... so i decide to check webmd to see what it may be and dont you know i could have all of the above diseases or syndromes... (not to make light of anyone with any of the serious ailments above) the logical part of me says, "you need more water", my blood is obviously in desperate need of oxygen hence causing my veins to all but shut down while i sleep instead of streaming happily through my body... today i all but gave myself water toxicity in efforts to get back on the path i was with drinking water before my life was uprooted to go earn a buck...

so for a seriously neurotic person such as myself, webmd is probably not the best choice in diagnosing my ailments... im not sure why im always compelled to go to the site and use the symptom checker... i have had just about everything as far as they are concerned... before me sits a list of local doctors, we have the coverage, so i guess i should use it since we are paying almost a $100 a WEEK for this crap... ugh dont get me started there!

im back on my food plan tomorrow... i cant do this rollercoaster anymore.. i have been consistantly losing weigh, even through the past two weeks where bojangles seasoned fries comforted me on the ride home after a rediculous day at work where some dickwad i work with was just a big prick.... ahhhh the joys of emotional eating... will i ever overcome.....

so i vow today that i will not give in to the temptations as i drive home past every single fast food restaurant calling my name, begging me to come visit... i will instead, bring an extra bag of carrots in my brown bag and crunch my merry way back home.... and if above mentioned dickwad cares to be disrespectful again, i will politely tell him to fuck off in my own polite manner and let it roll off my back...

to the gym i go... burn mf'er burn =)