what is this blog about you ask? nothing, everything, something... it's about my life, a way to vent it all out, a place to babble about things...some days i am creative, others not so much... enjoy


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It's all about the things I want in life,

the battle I face to get there,

the strength I need to make it through another day.

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

so much to tell, so little time

well if you have noticed my total lack of time to blog, and well keep up generally just about everywhere it is because, i decided to take a job at Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket the store is located about 25 mins away, its a brand new store, setting to open on august 30th. i have been enduring the whole training process for the last weeks, including many an early morning work arrivals. i decided to choose the logistics department. basically that means, we take in the truck and put out freight, do price changes, set up new displays, etc etc etc... i have done my training at a few other stores, but im eager to get into our store and get things moving along. anyone who has worked in retail, knows its not rocket science, but hey its a job, it pays really well for this area, and i dont have to break my back or work 50 hours a week between two jobs to make some money. so if you have been wondering where i ran off to, and whats been occupying my time, there you have... with a few naps thrown in there on my 4 and 5 am days...

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jacob and tabby, went back home to ohio a week or so ago (traci's sisters' kids). it was nice getting to spend some time with them, swimming and such.... here's a summers end picture of all 4 of the twerps together... isnt it amazing how not tan they are for being in the south... i look at myself in the mirror and wonder why in the world i have no color either... probably due to the fact that its too damn hot to go outside while the sun is out...LOL

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my final tidbit of news for now, is the fact that my very beautiful cousin jaclyn is about to embark on the most major change in her life tomorrow (wed aug 22nd), she is packing the car and heading off to college. im sorta sad that i cant be there to watch her off and help her move into the dorms. im so jealous of the opportunity she has been given and wish i had pushed for the opportunity when i was her age.... so say a few prayers for jaclyn, and aunt cathy too (my goodness she must be going nuts), that the move goes smooth, and jaclyn loves every minute of her college experience.

well thats about all i have for ya's now... i will try to stay up to date in the next few weeks, but my blogs will probably be scarce until the store opening is over and we get on a normal weekly schedule and i find time to manage all my lovely responsibilities.... damn to be a teenager again...LOL

for now....
peace out people!!!

Saturday, August 04, 2007

"who am i"

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so for a few days now i have been contemplating the all too important question, who am i... as proposed at the outlet, a blog created by the beautiful and talented adele nieves[check out her other blog a book without a cover in the links section], of liquid words. adele and i reconnected a couple of years ago in email. we were high school classmates. so since initially reading the blog, i started thinking about who i am, and what my purpose has been for my being on this earth. as most of you know i have done some soul searching since losing my son and making as many positive changes in my life as possible. i started out small, with small goals in mind. i have worked my way up to some larger changes including picking up and moving 800 miles away from all things comfortable.
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so the other day i sat down and began typing my answer to the hugely open question of who am i. my initial intention was to forward off my conclusions to Adele [ i still may do that], but i figured i should share the question with you guys and give you some food for thought as well.

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you see the picture i have of myself is somewhat completely opposite of the life i actually live... i have this idea of the life i want to live and feel i work pretty hard to achieve those goals, but other parts of me haven't quite reached the potential i believe them to be. i almost feel like i am a hippie trapped in the body of an over made, over make-up'd, big haired woman. i dream of living off the land, meditating hours a day, doing yoga, running barefoot through the fields of planted daisies. cloth diapering my children, all while toting them around in a sling as i am preparing baby food from the fresh fruits and veggies growing in my garden.
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you see this is the vision i have for my life, its so important to me to be a more whole person. to give 110% to myself, my health, my future, my family, my community. i know i have made great strives toward my ultimate me and with a little work i will become who i envision myself to be. i still though get up everyday, put on my make up, gussy up my hair, dress my best, even if i am just running to the recycle center to drop off my bottles and cans, in my duster skirt and berks.
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so i guess the point i am making, or at least set out to make is that sometimes the package is much bigger then the gift itself. all in all, the only thing that matters in the end is how you feel about yourself, and in the last year or so i have really come to realize that i love myself for who i am, who i have been, who i want to be, and who i will day become... through and through

*note to self - dwindle down some of the cover girl and let your natural beauty shine through.

yum yum want some?

a few weeks back i started randomly receiving vegetarian magazine... [ let me say nothing happens randomly, im sure there is some deep seeded reason that it mysteriously started arriving in my name, to my mailbox, maybe as a reminder that i need to keep working hard at eating healthy] im not sure where it came from as anyone who knows me, knows i enjoy me a nice well done steak, and yummy chicken... on the cover of the latest issue i received was a picture of a vegetarian pizza that looked so delicious, i had to make it, my way of course, as onions are not a part of my diet, ever!



phil being phil had to have some meat on his, so he opted for the left over turkey meatballs from the previous nights dinner... i chose a small cucumber and tomato (the first from my garden) salad with a splish of olive oil, and my veggie and cheese pizza... i donned my pizza with zucchini and squash slices, and some tomatoes, layered on top of some ricotta cheese, topped with some fresh mozzarella and some shredded =)



doesnt it make you want a pizza?
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