new leaf, new life

i swear life throws you curve balls to see how you will react...
i am mentally and physically exhausted all the time
trying to do the best i can for everyone
and im almost always failing someone at one time or another
i cant be everything everyone wants me to be
its slowing burning a hole in me
im trying for him, her, them, us
it doesnt seem to have been noticed
the only person i dont seem to be trying for is myself

again, im starting over
im sure some will fall to the wayside
in order for me to be all that i am
i have to make me a priority
and that includes all that make me who i am

there are 168 hours in a week
i need to divide them evenly
as to not leave anyone behind
including myself

i have a plan, i wrote it out
i have to make it happen
i will make it happen


4/26/10 -

today i

- read a magazine from cover to cover while listening to music
- i made dinner for my husband
- i grocery shopped (and am proud to say 80% of my cart was fresh fruits and veggies)
- i worked out for 45 mins
- i cleaned up my mountain of papers, mail, and magazines
- i bought myself roses
- i meditated for 1 hr 15 mins
- i wrote a letter that i don't ever intend on sending, freeing non the less

today is a fresh start for me
im taking back my life