it's not always sunshine and roses

it's written all over my face
disappointment
hurt
anger


i cant find the words to say how i feel
instead i bottle it all up and wait for the moment
the one moment that will feel right to let it out

so for now
i will live amongst a school of smiles

quotes

"Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail."


- Ralph Waldo Emerson

 
 
 
 
 
 
 

"It is good to have an end to journey toward; but it is the journey that matters, in the end."


- Ursula Le Guin

 

"You need to be aware of what others are doing, applaud their efforts, acknowledge their successes, and encourage them in their pursuits. When we all help one another, everybody wins."


- Jim Stovall

 

"You get the best out of others when you give the best of yourself."


- Harry Firestone

new leaf, new life

i swear life throws you curve balls to see how you will react...
i am mentally and physically exhausted all the time
trying to do the best i can for everyone
and im almost always failing someone at one time or another
i cant be everything everyone wants me to be
its slowing burning a hole in me
im trying for him, her, them, us
it doesnt seem to have been noticed
the only person i dont seem to be trying for is myself

again, im starting over
im sure some will fall to the wayside
in order for me to be all that i am
i have to make me a priority
and that includes all that make me who i am

there are 168 hours in a week
i need to divide them evenly
as to not leave anyone behind
including myself

i have a plan, i wrote it out
i have to make it happen
i will make it happen


4/26/10 -

today i

- read a magazine from cover to cover while listening to music
- i made dinner for my husband
- i grocery shopped (and am proud to say 80% of my cart was fresh fruits and veggies)
- i worked out for 45 mins
- i cleaned up my mountain of papers, mail, and magazines
- i bought myself roses
- i meditated for 1 hr 15 mins
- i wrote a letter that i don't ever intend on sending, freeing non the less

today is a fresh start for me
im taking back my life

" Quiet your mind so that inspirations may rise from its depths" Unknown

have you ever felt like you were just being pulled in all directions?  that is precisely how i have been feeling lately...  i feel a little stressed out and the fact that i am not doing the things i need to be doing for myself are causing me even more stress....

it has been a few weeks since i have meditated... i often use the excuse of "not enough time" when it comes to everything in my life that is about me... not to make excuses but work has been crazy, my schedule is up, down and all over the place... i am exhausted beyond words most days... the only little pleasure i seem to find is going on facebook and playing stupid games...

as of tonight im taking back my time... im giving myself exactly what i need to give myself in order to get back on the path i was walking (or should i say running ) on 3 months ago... i felt so good then, in control, together, healthy

now i just feel over extended and under appreciated... frankly this is just not working for me... so now i take back my life, in a whole, at home, at work...

HOW TO MEDITATE 

to be continued....